Saturday, April 3, 2010

Radiation, Dots and Laser Tag

Radiation was the recommendation for my cancer cells to be both weakened and reduced in size. After x-rays and MRI's, small circles were drawn on Chastity (my "special spot"), so that precision to the cancerous cells could be radiated. Every treatment consisted of the external beams targeting the dots and beaming radiation deep into the tissue for a few minutes. Though Chastity was getting used to the treatment, I loathed the daily trips to the clinic. At some point, cancer does become a full-time job!

I recall having the technician color the dots on Chastity. At my first treatment, they applied that which resembled a henna type of dotted tattoo. I wanted a marker so I could play connect-the-dots. When else could one do so in life? It was at my next treatment that they uped the ante. There was no henna tattoo, but a real machine with a small motor attached. I felt as though I was at a tattoo shop. They applied the machine to my henna stained dots and created black little circles within my pelvic area. Little dots now decorate Chastity, she is unique and one of a kind!. I requested a floral design or something of more substance, but apparently the clinic's aren't licensed to do such!

My family including my parents were still not taking the cancer news well. It was difficult for me to tune them in to my events when I can visually see their world crashing down. I am a very strong pillar in my family. I carry strength, determination and motivation like none other. Mother always states, "You can fall into a pile of poop, but YOU always come out smelling like roses." This statement is VERY true within my life. I knew the importance of remaining strong for my family.

I decided to change up terms about cancer treatments. I had too - It was important to keep my loved ones informed but also relaxed about the illness I was facing. Re-naming my "special spot", Chastity, seemed to work so why not other events too? I told my family about my decorated Chastity and they handled it quite well. How else can one speak of such a private situation and a private spot and expose it so publicly to one's family?

While getting radiated, I always envisioned the beam coming straight down like when one plays laser tag. You always aim the beam right at your opponent and then when they least expect it - ZAP! ZAP! ZAP!

Mom: "Hey sweetie, how are you doing today?"
Me: "I'm good. I'm off to laser tag."
Mom: "Oh, ok. Well, you sound busy, call me when your done."
Me: "Ok, love you!"
Mom: "Love you too!"

It wasn't until hours later, that Mother calls me again.

Mom: "Wait a second, why are you playing laser tag? Didn't you have radiation today?"
Me: "Yep. That's where I was."

Mom begins to giggle and giggles some more. "I didn't catch on to that!" I proceed to relate the comparisons of radiation and laser tag to her. "It's true Mom, 3 times a week they play laser tag with Chastity!" Mother laughs, "Yes, I guess they do." Laser tag with a decorated Chastity - this is a game of life. Last I checked, Chastity was up 20, treatments that is, and still fighting! Fight ON!

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